Sunday, March 21, 2004

StormTrooper

Hamilton County's Darth Vader has issued a fatwa against Gay Marriage. It appears that Homosexual Marriage would get more of a response than a real crime like Theft:
San Francisco has Rice-A-Roni, the Golden Gate and gay weddings. Cincinnati has cheese coneys, the Big Mac and Sheriff Si Leis - who will make sure cable cars will climb Carew Tower before there are gay weddings on the steps at City Hall.

"I would make an arrest," Leis said. "By law, you can't have a male marry a male or a female marry a female." He said same-sex marriage is a misdemeanor, with a $500 fine and six months in jail.

"It's an outrage. It destroys the very fiber of our country. I don't understand why they're afraid to do something about it" in San Francisco.
As with his theocratic crusade against porn, Leis seems to poised to allow real crimes with real victims to go unpunished. Si Leis is responsible for police protection in this area of Hamilton County: Anderson Township, Colerain Township, Columbia Township, Crosby Township, Green Township, Harrison Township, Miami Township, SycamoreTownship, Symmes Township, Whitewater Township, and the Village of North Bend. According to his department's own website those areas represent over 200,000 residents. How many crimes are still open in those areas? Has Leis's deputies solved every single theft? How about ever Assault, Rape or even Domestic Violence cases? Until he solves those, maybe he cannot worry about wasting his deputies valuable patrol time by worrying about laws that matter to him more than other laws. Based on his own stats, he has not done that, but has the time to be interviewed on Gay Marriage and politics.

It amazed me that Bronson would write such a column. I mean I know Bronson sees Leis as an "Angel doing 'God's' will" and all (note the hyperbole), but wouldn't he want to tout Leis's ability to protect people from real crimes that actually hurt someone? I mean of all "crimes" to use as Leis' crowning achievement, why use enforcement of the anti-homosexual DOMA, when one could use scarce resources to enforce crimes that will actually impact people's lives? Well, it is an election year and we know Peter Bronson has to froth up the mouths of the good old boys at his bible club. Getting out the paleo-con vote is a very messy business.

What makes me nervous is Leis and Bronson's call for a "Metro" government, which really means making the entire county into one municipality. The motivation for this is the assumption that the GOP and fascists like Leis could then rule the City with an iron fist. Leis could drive out the "liberals" who dare not push his theocratic stances, like those down in Tennessee. Now, what I don't understand is how Leis really thinks merging the city together with the inner suburbs will really change government? At this point the GOP has been abandoning the city, and Bronson regularly bashes downtown and the city every chance he gets.

Wes Flinn also comments on this column and mentions a key point, Simon Leis basically threatened to arrest the Mayor. Now, by law, he would have the right to in the case of marrying a same sex couple, but should it not be examined as a totally uncalled for public comment? Leis sounds like a warlord when he declares that he is the law and he will be the one who judges the guilty. Again, some hyperbole, but his tone is just so warlike. He sounds like he is trying to be Rameses to Luken?s Moses. I would call him Nottingham to Luken?s Robin Hood, if Luken had the courage to defy the ?law.?

For the Record, if Leis is Darth Vader, I want to be Han Solo. Han gets more "chicks."

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